Should you get an agent - or be your child's agent?

When a club starts showing real interest in your son or daughter, something changes overnight. The phone starts ringing, agents appear, scouts leave their numbers, and suddenly everyone has an opinion about your child’s future. It is exciting - and it is exactly the moment where families make the decisions they later regret.

The question I get asked most by parents is a simple one: do we even need an agent, or should I just do it myself? There is no single right answer. But there are a lot of wrong ways to decide it.

If your child is good enough, the clubs will find them. Your job is to protect the person - not to sell the player.

Handling the interest from agents and scouts

When scouts and agents come calling, the first thing to do is slow everything down. Interest is flattering, and flattery is exactly how bad deals get signed. Ask for everything in writing. Check that anyone calling themselves an agent is genuinely licensed - FIFA re-regulated the profession, and a real agent is registered, accountable and easy to verify through the official FIFA agent system. Take several conversations with several different people, never just the first one who calls. And be very careful of anyone who arrives with big promises about your child’s future: the honest ones talk about work and risk, not guarantees.

Ask your network, too. Other parents who have been through it, coaches you trust, players a few years ahead on the same path. Recommendations from people with nothing to gain are worth more than any pitch. Above all, trust is the whole thing. You are not choosing who shouts loudest - you are choosing who you would trust with your child’s career for the next ten years.

Can a parent be the agent?

Sometimes, yes. Some of the biggest careers in the game have been guided by a parent. Lionel Messi’s father, Jorge, went from working in a steel factory to running his son’s contracts, sponsorships and image rights - and it worked, in part because the family kept bringing real expertise in around him rather than doing everything alone. But for every Jorge Messi there are countless young players whose first contract was quietly signed by a well-meaning relative who was simply out of their depth - and who left money, protection and development on the table without ever knowing it.

So the honest question is not “can I?” but “should I?” Do you want to be your child’s parent, or their negotiator - and can you truly be both when a club is sitting across the table and the relationship is on the line?

Ask yourself one thing: do you want to be your child’s parent, or their negotiator? Being both is harder than it looks.

You don’t always need a traditional agent - but you do need the right people

It is worth knowing that “agent or no agent” is not the only choice. Kevin De Bruyne famously negotiated an £83m Manchester City contract without a traditional agent - by bringing in lawyers and data analysts to prove his value instead. The lesson for a family is not “do it alone.” It is that what you actually need is the right expertise in the room - legal, financial, and someone who genuinely knows the market - whatever shape that takes.

Where to get honest advice

The most valuable phone call you will make usually costs nothing. Go to the people whose entire job is to protect players, not to profit from them. In Denmark, Spillerforeningen advises players - and parents - on whether they even need an agent, reviews agent agreements before you sign, and gives impartial guidance on the first contract. Independent advice from someone with no stake in the deal is exactly what a nervous, excited family needs most.

The bottom line

There is no universal answer to whether you should hire an agent or be one yourself. It depends on your child, your family, and how honestly you can separate the two roles. What never changes is the principle: trust is everything, promises are cheap, and if your child is genuinely good enough, the clubs will find them with or without a hard sell. Take your time, ask the people who have nothing to gain, and make the choice that lets your son or daughter just be a footballer - while someone they trust handles the rest.

Trust is everything. Promises are cheap. And real talent has a way of being found.